Happy Saturday

Happy Saturday, it's after midnight. I had a nice evening watching a movie and eating popcorn and getting to know a friend better. I'll tell you right now things were so different when I was in my 20's. I think I've gotten old fashioned in my old age. Things eemed so much simplier than. I never was concerned if I was doing something right or wrong. Now for some strange reason I want to do it right. I know that's better but in many ways it sucks. And it's not just the behavior I could pull that off but I'd be thinking all the time that I'd done something wrong. Now I understand why Carrie (SITC) pours such angst in her column. Getting older and wiser is not all it's cracked up to be unless you're Samantha.
I used to be Samantha but not any more. Ok there has to be some things better about being cautious and tentative. Shit I can't think of anything. The head and the heart and the romantic in me really need to sit down and have a good talk because none of them want the same thing. And I guess what is so sad about it all is when I was young inspite of hurts I had hopes but now I'm scared to death to hope. I am so jaded. I don't know if that will ever go away. I'd like it to leave but I just don't know what it would take to make that happen. Of course, right I'm listening to the Eagles old stuff that always makes me sad. I guess all I can do is keep plugging away and kept looking out for my heart as it can not travel in dangerous waters anymore.