What's next

I'm back. I've been doing what many people do at certain ages. I just turned 55 and I looked back over my years to see what I've accomplished both career wise and family wise. I've done pretty well in my career. I went from a therapist to a vice president in a behavioral health agency and then private practice. After all of that I could see all the wholes in the mental health system. I moved to Tucson, my own Funky Town, where I found the faith I'd lost years ago. Not religion but spirituality. I became a Reiki Master Teacher. I learned all I could about intuition. And completed a distance learning program in parapsychic science in which I will get a Ph.d ( I started writing it just before I got sick) I am now ready to do my dissertation. And then I have started another Ph.d in holistic health. I have contacted publishers to get my 3 books out there. So career wise I am pleased. On the personal life arena, not so good. I've had 3 failed marriages. The first two were only a year a piece and the last one I was married for over 17 years and had a daughter from that union. The more I think about my past life the more I know he was the only true love I had. After I divorced him (he was a cheater), I had 3 long term relationships. The first one was the best. He was what any woman would love to have. Perfect in everyway except he wanted to get married and I didn't. I was too scared. I had been too hurt to do that again. So we parted friends. The 2nd long term relationship was with someone whose intellect attracted me. He was very smart, a writer and 14 years younger than than me. We stayed together for 7 years. His libido was at 0 and mine was at +10 so after awhile I just couldn't take it any more. I never cheated on him. The 3rd long term relationship was for 4 years and as best friends we were fine but he had ED and being old fashioned if he couldn't do THAT he wouldn't do anything else. Again I never cheated at some point I realized I needed and deserved more than that. So now I am focusing on my writing and school courses and am dating a very nice guy. I am however ready to deal with it if something goes awry in this dating relationship. I have married myself. I know that sounds strange but I bought a wedding set cheap and I wear it on my left hand to remind me that I can take care of myself and I don't need a man to make me fulfilled. So far so good. Gosh don't you just love introspection! More later.